A quick reminder on non-conformity in a world that tells you what to do

Written by: Shin Kitane/Thursday, Apr 12, 2018 07:38 AM

Tell you what, I recently deleted some online shopping apps on my phone. I also unfollowed some Instagram-models who peddle flawlessness and perfection through their feeds. I don’t know what triggered it, but I just suddenly found myself too tired—of all the plump lips and perfectly-plucked brows, the teeny waists and stretch mark-free bums.


I think that in a world where it’s so easy to crave for things and buy them with the tap of a button, I’d like to try and not expose myself to excessive stimuli when it comes to dictating what one should and shouldn't have. 

But I guess the point is that it’s so easy to get swayed by mass culture. It’s so easy to forget about your realities—your paycheck, your mortgage, your bills—when you’re face-to-screen with the shiniest iPhone, or the newest highlighter palette. Too easy to spend your hard-earned money on a pot of Aztec clay because hundreds of Instagram girls swear by it. 


We keep falling into these pits, we keep molding our bodies into what society deems “beautiful” at the moment—thigh gaps (which I couldn’t achieve, for the life of me), skinny brows, thick brows, big butt, full lips (which you can apparently achieve by lip plumpers that sting like hell), shiny hair. The list goes on, and so do our frustrations. We keep our eyes on what we should be, but couldn’t be, because our minds are bent on conforming, on blending in.


Whoever told us it was cool to be part of a herd? Okay, maybe it is cool, but who cares? 



Isn’t it funny how different lighting can make your body look so different? I was in the change rooms at the shops the other day, and I had just finished a fairly large-ish meal so I was incredibly bloated, already feeling a little unfit as well because I had just gotten back from the states and not exercised in over 3 weeks, and it was one of those change rooms with the horrible downlighting that shows EVERY SINGLE DIMPLE, and I just remember being shocked in what I saw and thought “okay surely I didn’t lose THAT much tone while I was overseas?”. I went to bed feeling a bit shitty about myself which I know is stupid but sometimes your mind just does that to you, and I woke up the next day and looked in the mirror expecting to be equally as shocked but I wasn’t, I looked the same as I always do. The point I’m trying to get across is that everyone has little imperfections, cellulite, wobbly bits and scars, but it’s not something to be ashamed of because: A. No one else notices them or thinks they’re bad other than you. B. Lighting plays a huge factor, so if you look at someone on Instagram and think to yourself “why don’t they have cellulite?” Or this and that, chances are they probably do, they’re just never going to post a photo where you can see it. C. Even so, your body is amazing and SO MUCH MORE than a few little dimples. I’ve said it once and I’ll say it again: you weren’t ashamed of your cellulite when you were a baby were you?! SO WHY ARE YOU SELF CONSCIOUS ABOUT IT NOW? Feeling any kind of shame about any part of our bodies is something that our brains have learned throughout adolescence and adulthood - it’s something modern society has taught us to do. But do you want to know what the best thing is for your body? Better than healthy food and exercise? - LOVE! We are so used to picking apart every little imperfection on our bodies and critiquing every little fat roll and stretch mark when at the end of the day what we are craving most are love and acceptance from ourselves. Change the way you see your body, choose to love yourself first and focus more on what your body can do rather than what it looks like ✨

A post shared by BECK JACKSON 🦒 (@becklomas) on

These days I find myself double-tapping fitness “get real” posts where even the most ripped athletes show they have love handles when they sit down or have ample cellulite under the harsh lighting of a mall dressing room. I find comfort in other’s efforts to be raw, to break the wall that tells us that perfection is a thing and that conformity is the way to go. Because at the end of the day, we're all human. All made of flesh and bone that are not exempted from the rules of gravity and cell aging. In a world of filters and photoshopped arms, it's a breath of fresh air to see the real, the raw, the not-so-perfect. 



About Shin Kitane
Shin Kitane writes to remember and believes that words have the power to heal, inspire, and move others. She dreams of a world where men and women are treated equally, where race, gender, and religion are not measures of one's worth in society. She is also a book-hoarder and a firm believer in re-watching Mean Girls and Harry Potter multiple times a year. Follow her misadventures @shinkitane on social media.

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